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It would be really nice if I have someone beside me to talk to right now. But I always end up talking with my laptop, pretend like it is listening and responding to what I say. I dont know why I'm fooling myself like this. Few days ago, I had a conversation with a guy in my office. He asked me if I ever hurt any guy before. yeaa, I did. So, he said..that's why I cant be happy. I agreed. But should they put all the blame on me alone? They think that I am happy everytime I break someone's feeling. They dont know, how bad I feel about it. Sometimes, they make me hate myself.

How I wish, when I open my eyes the next day, I will lose my mind..that I cant remember anything..forget everything...